CODY RANTS ON DETECTIVE PIKACHU
Mike: Wassup, Team DO5! Today, we watched Detective Pikachu, and Cody is ranting like a psycho! Cody: Honestly, the people that worked on this film needs to go to a mental hospital! Mike: Why? Cody: Because I’m sick and tired of this “Make Animated Films Realistic” that’s been trending recently! It’s just horrible! Mike: Well they’re really cool! Cody: But they’re taking away the fun and coolness away! Just look at the recent Disney realistic reboots like the Lion King or Beauty and the Beast! It’s just lifeless, boring remakes of the original! Jake: But Cody, these movies are fantastic! Cody: “Fantastic” as “try to make as much money with a retarded animated remake as possible”! Mike: But Lil Uzi Vert did on song in the movie called “Electricity”. It’s awesome! Cody: Yeah, but that song is so much better than the entire movie! Mike: Well you’re just a hater! The plot was crafted beautifully and outrageously awesome! Cody: Well let’s look at the plot from Wikipedia, shall we? Three weeks after Thanos used the Infinity Gauntlet to disintegrate half of all life in the universe,1 Carol Danvers rescues Tony Stark and Nebula from deep space and returns them to Earth. They reunite with the remaining Avengers—Bruce Banner, Steve Rogers, Rocket, Thor, Natasha Romanoff, and James Rhodes—and use Nebula's knowledge to find and ambush Thanos. They plan on retaking the Infinity Stones and using them to reverse the disintegrations, but Thanos reveals he has already destroyed them to prevent further use. An enraged Thor decapitates Thanos. Five years later, Scott Lang escapes from the quantum realm.2 He travels to the Avengers' compound, where he explains to Romanoff and Rogers that he experienced only five hours while trapped. Theorizing that the quantum realm could allow time travel, the three ask Stark to help them retrieve the Stones from the past to reverse Thanos' actions in the present, but Stark refuses to help out of fear of losing his daughter, Morgan. After talking with his wife Pepper Potts, Stark relents and he and Banner–who has since merged his intelligence with the Hulk's strength and body–successfully build a time machine. Banner warns that changing the past does not affect their present, and that any changes instead create branched alternate realities. He and Rocket go to New Asgard, the Asgardian refugees' new home in Norway, to recruit Thor, now an overweight alcoholic despondent over his failure to stop Thanos. In Tokyo, Romanoff recruits Clint Barton, now a ruthless vigilante following the disintegration of his family. Banner, Lang, Rogers, and Stark travel to New York City in 2012.3 Banner visits the Sanctum Sanctorum and convinces the Ancient One to give him the Time Stone. Rogers successfully retrieves the Mind Stone, but Stark and Lang's interference inadvertently allows 2012 Loki to escape with the Space Stone. Rogers and Stark travel to S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters in 1970, where Stark obtains an earlier version of the Space Stone, and encounters a young Howard Stark in the process, while Rogers steals several Pym Particles from Hank Pym to return to the present. Rocket and Thor travel to Asgard in 2013. They extract the Reality Stone from Jane Foster4 and retrieve Thor's hammer, Mjolnir. Nebula and Rhodes travel to Morag in 2014 and steal the Power Stone before Peter Quill can.5 Rhodes returns to the present with the Power Stone, but Nebula is incapacitated when her cybernetic implants link with those of her past self. Through this connection, 2014 Thanos learns of his future success and the Avengers' attempts to undo it. Thanos captures present-Nebula and sends past-Nebula to the present day disguised as her future self. Barton and Romanoff travel to Vormir, where the Soul Stone's keeper, the Red Skull, reveals it can only be acquired by sacrificing someone they love. Romanoff sacrifices herself, allowing Barton to obtain the Soul Stone. Reuniting in the present, the Avengers fit the Stones into a Stark-created gauntlet, which Banner uses to resurrect all those whom Thanos had disintegrated. Past-Nebula uses the time machine to transport past Thanos and his warship to the present where he attacks the Avengers' compound, planning to completely wipe out and then rebuild the universe with the Stones. Nebula convinces past-Gamora to betray Thanos, and kills her past self. Stark, Rogers, and Thor battle Thanos but are outmatched. A restored Stephen Strange arrives with other Masters of Mystic Arts, the restored Avengers and Guardians of the Galaxy, as well as the armies of Wakanda, Asgard, and the Ravagers to fight Thanos and his army alongside Danvers, who destroys Thanos' warship as she arrives. After overpowering the heroes, Thanos seizes the gauntlet, but Stark steals the Stones and uses them to disintegrate Thanos and his army, dying from the energy emitted in the process. Following Stark's funeral, Thor appoints Valkyrie as the ruler of New Asgard and joins the Guardians of the Galaxy while Quill searches for 2014 Gamora. Rogers returns the Infinity Stones to their original places in time, and remains in the past to live with Peggy Carter. In the present, an elderly Rogers passes on his shield and mantle to Sam Wilson. Cody: Whoops! Wrong plot! Tim Goodman is a 21-year-old insurance salesman who had given up Pokémon training due to the death of his mother and the absence of his father, Harry. While hanging out with his friend Jack, Tim learns that Harry has presumably died while investigating a case. He travels to Ryme City, a metropolis that outlaws Pokémon fighting and pushes the bonds of humans and Pokémon alike, to collect Harry's assets. Tim also meets Lucy Stevens, a fluff columnist who wants to be a reporter and is suspicious of Harry's death, and her Psyduck. While reminiscing in his apartment, Tim encounters a Pikachu with a detective hat that can speak and only he can somehow understand. They are attacked by a party of Aipomb under the influence of a purple gas that Tim accidentally released, but they both escape. They take shelter at a café where Pikachu reveals that he has amnesia, but that he definitely knows he was Harry's partner and that they were investigating a case together. They look for Lucy who reveals that while investigating, she discovered that Harry was once at Ryme Wharf and set out to find clues. Tim and Pikachu interrogate a Mr. Mime who directs them to an illegal underground fighting arena owned by Sebastian, whose Charizard Pikachu had fought before. Sebastian demands a rematch, but Pikachu cannot remember his own moves and Sebastian gives Charizard the same mysterious gas labeled "R". While Tim attempts to save Pikachu, Sebastian accidentally releases R and the entire stadium gets affected alerting the authorities, but not before Sebastian reveals to Tim that he got R from "the doctor". Tim argues with police lieutenant Hideo Yoshida that Harry may be alive, but Yoshida shows him the video of Harry's crash; explaining that it would have been impossible. Soon, Tim and Pikachu are met by Ms. Norman who takes them to see Ryme City's benefactor Howard Clifford, who had once tried to cure his ailing condition and instead created the humanitarian city. He shows him more revealing footage of Harry surviving the attack, most likely from Mewtwo, but that he was taken away by the Pokémon leaving Pikachu with amnesia. Howard tells them to watch out for his son Roger who he claims is in control of his company and the city. With this new information, Tim and Pikachu recruit Lucy and Psyduck. The group breaks into the lab facility Harry was investigating, learning that Dr. Ann Laurent, the doctor Sebastian mentioned, was experimenting on Mewtwo and had apparently hired Harry to aid them. They are soon attacked by several Greninja who chase them out of the building but are fended off by Psyduck. They then escape a field of colossal Torterra, but Pikachu is gravely injured. Tim manages to communicate to a Bulbasaur and takes Pikachu to a clearing in the forest where they are greeted by Mewtwo, who heals Pikachu and attempts to reveal its intent but is captured by Roger. Thinking that he betrayed Harry to a vengeful Mewtwo, Pikachu leaves Tim while the others return to Ryme City to warn Howard. Pikachu comes across the area where Harry crashed his car and finds proof that it was not Mewtwo who attacked, but the Greninja. Tim reaches Howard, but learns too late that he intends to transfer his consciousnesses into Mewtwo and use R so that the Pokémon can become docile enough for him to fuse them with their owners, thus allowing humans to evolve within their Pokémon. Pikachu arrives and finally summons his electricity powers to battle Mewtwo. Tim, meanwhile finds out that "Roger" was actually Ms. Norman who was really a Ditto; the real Roger having been tied up and hidden. Tim subdues Ditto with R while Pikachu fends Mewtwo long enough for Tim to free Mewtwo from Howard's control. Mewtwo restores everyone to normal while Howard is arrested. Roger is impressed with Lucy and hires her as a full-time reporter. Mewtwo then reveals that Harry was in fact fused with Pikachu so as to help solve the case and unfuses them. Harry offers Tim the chance to return home, but Tim decides to stay in order to spend time with him and Pikachu. Jake: Crying Just you saying it brings back those amazing scenes... Alex: Crying Never forget the time where Mewtwo looked awesome... Emma: Crying The city looked so realistic and bright... Ryan: Crying I wish Danny Devito starred in the movie... Cody: YOU GUYS ARE THE WORST MOVIE CRITICS OF ALL OF MOVIE CRITIC HISTORY!!! YOU ONLY LIKE IT BECAUSE OF POKÉMON!!! Mike: No we don’t! Cody: Well what if it was just a plain old movie about a kid trying to find his missing dad who works as a detective? Mike: It would be ass! Cody: Exactly! UglyDolls is an Oscar worthy movie when compared to this garbage! This actually made me like The Emoji Movie! Woody: But what about Toy Story 4? This one is gonna be movie of the year! Cody: TOY STORY 3 ENDED PERFECTLY!!! WE DON’T NEED NO MORE FUCKING SEQUELS!!! Cody breaks down crying Cody: Crying I absolutely hate this new generation of movies... whatever happened to the golden age of movies? When will movie makers finally start caring more about making good movies then exploiting people in exchange for money? Mike: CODY!!! YOU ARE A HATER!!! YOU HATE IT BECAUSE YOU DO!!! AND IT WASN’T CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM EITHER!!! Tim: Now we will kill you! Detective Pikachu: Prepare to die! Danny Devito: I’m the trash man! Everyone kills Cody Category:Fanfic Category:DaddyOFive